Tuesday, October 6, 2009

too long for a comment

This started out as a comment to the comments by Bobbie and webwisewoman but then developed a life of its own so I decided to make it into a new post.
I'm thinking there's several short stories in there after reading about what a short story is by Nadine Gordimer. And the coming full circle I guess is that maybe I did learn something from that essay course I took at Writers and Books those many years ago, you know like there's got to be a point you're making, tying things together. Eliot says what's this thing about mothers and daughters. I said Freud figured it out but Eliot never even heard of Oedipus. All he knows about is hiking and stocks. I know I'd never get lost in the woods with Eliot. Now there's another short story.
Bobbie, It's finally comforting to have all these siblings especially my youngest brother who was only 11 when I got married and I only got to know 30 years later. I sure didn't feel that way many times in the past. Eliot is an only child and has only one son. It makes his life simpler. Maybe that's why he loves those Alvins so much.
But back to my siblings. I often wonder who's going to go first . My 75 year old sister who's in assisted living and can't walk and says her short term memory is shot. One of the twins who's 68, diabetic, had a quintuple bypass and parts of his esophogus and stomach and one kidney removed from cancer (diagnosed early), bad peripheral neuropathy and is in constant pain, takes 4 Vicodan a day but he's the patriarch. The other twin who was always the physical fitness nut and was a psychologist in the Air Force (now that's another story) but has chronic indolent leukemia, now in remission. My youngest brother who's 64 and travels all over the world (his wife used to have a tour guide business and is the daughter-in-law my mother my disliked) but is basically healthy and exercises a lot. He did have a failed hernia operation several years ago that perforated his intestine and was hospitalized a month. He also worries the most (after me) or will I be the first to go. My problems are not lifethreatening I think. I have peripheral neuropathy and might be pre-diabetic. Just started testing my blood sugar. My legs and feet swell and I wear elastic stockings. I have interstitial cystitis and don't empty my bladder so I'm prone to UTIs and have ulcerative proctitis which is currently in remission. Most of my problems are probably due to having been on a tricyclic anti-depression (desimpramine) for 7 years. The side effects were terrible but the half-empty glass was finally half-filled. I always thought my depression was caused by my seeing the pathology of the human race but it turned out to be the reuptake of norepinehrine in the synapsis. Or so they say. Anyhow now what keeps me alive is writing on my blog (and what saved me this summer when I sometimes felt that I'd rather not wake up in the morning) and finding all of you in cyberspace especially Bobbie and Celeste and now webwisewoman urging me to write. and all those other wonderful women whose blogs I read.
I wrote this this earlier but didn't post it right away because I wanted to ride my bicycle a little bit while Eliot walked and then Eliot wanted to go out to the early bird special at the Golden Corral (for those that don't know the Golden Corral is an all you can eat buffet that lures obese seniors in between meals). I thought this would be a good opportunity for me to see what would happen to my blood sugar if I just stayed away from the Dessert Bar and kept all other carbs to a minimum. I stuffed myself on green vegetables and salad with pine nuts and ham, a deviled egg and a bunless hot dog (they didn't have any sauerkraut - how can you eat a hot dog without sauerkraut?). My blood sugar was 107 right after the meal. I think that's okay. I'm keeping a log. My fasting blood sugar when I got up this morning was 84 and just 89 after a lowcarb breakfast.
Then we went to our storage shed because I told Mary Ellen I might have something about her Irish relatives. I didn't find what I was looking for but did find her little stuffed bear that she always took to bed and too many other old memories.

1 comment:

  1. I think medications cause incredible difficulties and reactions in people and don't trust Big Pharm at all (that should be a blog post of mine, shouldn't it? :^)).
    Yes, we write and write because for us it is like breathing.